Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Secret Ancient Gothic Rule Book

Of course, YOU must know what I am talking about. The moment you decide to join our cult subculture, the Elders give you this rulebook. But maybe the mortals non-goths would like to know the totally made up stereotypes, using sarcasm to make it sound like I believe them truth.

Of course, the book takes ages to read, let alone type, so I'll just add small parts.

"Thou shalt not smile."

"Fun is sinful."

"Joy is sinful."

"Colors are sinful."

"Thou shalt not sociallize with anyone that is not a goth."

"Thou shalt never be seen in the sunlight."

"Maidens shall be sacrificed on the thirteenth day of every month."

"Religon is sinful."


Of course, they also explain how you become a goth, but you must know that. Wait, some of you don't? YOU ARE NOT A GOTH! SHUN!

You are put in a room, surrounded my 13 people wearing black hoods, chanting. You are bitten by a vampire, but not turned into one- You are not worthy. If you prove your worthyness, you shall be turned into a vampire later on. It is every goths goal in life.

Then, you must follow all of the rules, or be killed.


So, yeah, that's the basics. There is one I don't really believe. "Thou shall not believe any of these rules, for they are all made up." It makes no sense....


(Maybe I'll have a serious post soon. I've been quite annoyed lately, and you either get pissed off rant or sarcasm.)

1 comment:

Ashlee said...

You know, I wrote my post for today a few days ago, before I read your sarcastic How to be Goth posts. So there's going to be even more xD I wonder if other people will join?